Guns N' Roses - Chinese Democracy

Since I started posting again 2-3 days ago, I have been asked the same question a few times now, "What happened to the "Chinese Democracy" review?" I guess I alluded to it so much, that my 3 readers have felt let down since I never actually posted one... So here you go, please realize this isn't actually finished... I found this rough manuscript in my files, and with as much as I'd love to finish it, I just don't care enough to... I haven't listened to "Chinese Democracy" since I started it, and really don't have any desire to finish the last four tracks... That being said, enjoy! -T 8/16/09


We'll I've been alluding to this review for a while, primarily because I have so many ethical issues with this even being considered an authentic GnR album. To me it comes across as an Axel Rose ego trip in which he is proclaiming to the world, "I am Guns N' Roses." I have recently been wondering if asked, if Axel would claim that he was in fact the mastermind behind all the amazing guitar work or true GnR albums, and that Izzy and Slash were a facade... The other option I have come up with is that this is in all actuality a demonstration of Axl's own insecurities... He has realized that without GnR, no one cares about him, and so he's still hiding behind something that died in the early 90's. I think he realized that if he released this as an Axel Rose solo album it's sales would have hit between 5 and 7 disc's it's first week and then never sold a disc again, but by using the nostalgia behind the name GnR he would actually sell a few discs... So here we are, it's obvious that I have wanted to hate this album for quite a while now, so please realize that I am totally biased in this review.

1 - Chinese Democracy - So ummm, I'm pretty sure my first band when I was 13 years old wrote this exact song... maybe I should be suing... Three chords, death metal distortion that sounds like it's coming from a no name $25 stop box... ummm yeah, calling this GnR is an insult to the great guitarists (Slash and Izzy) who are true GnR. The sad thing is it actually starts out pretty cool before the crappy numetal/deathmetal 13 year old guitarist stars playing... Oh well... Axel sounds like Axel, that's the only GnR thing about this track. Then near the end of the track, in order to over-compensate for the lack of guitar work early on, a pseudo-EVH solo comes in... Sorry, but thus far I'm convinced that GnR is dead... Not good, especially when I've just finished the opener.

2 - Shackler's Revenge - Ummm, did I accidentally put in NIN? Oh wait, no there's Axel... So now we have dark-90's-alt with a dance beat... The solo from this track is even more over-compensating than the first track. A truly great lead guitarist (Slash) knows when to play fast and when to play slow. Every guitarist on the album thus far is just trying to show off how fast his fingers can fly... If your EVH more power too you, everyone else... well yeah you get the idea.

3 - Better - I hope the song lives up to its title and the album is getting better... Honestly, the verses aren't bad, they sound like GnR, and the guitar this time around doesn't sound like a 13 year old with a death metal stop box, but the chorus "now I know better, now you know I know better, I know you better..." or something like that... anyway, it's horrible... for the 30+ million and 17 years spent on this album, you would have though someone would have had the heart to tell Axel that his chorus is horrible. Guitar work better (for the most part), verses are decent, but the chorus is horrible.

4 - Street of Dreams - This track starts out with some nice piano and acoustic guitar (say wanna be "November Rain"), the vocals are horrible, they sound to me like Axel doing a really bad Robert Plant impersonation... The vocals just do not fit with this track at all... On the flip side, this track does have the best and most GnR like guitar solo we've heard yet.

5 - If The World - Someone please stop the bad pseudo-GnR... The classical guitar and samba sound is something that should be backing, say Carlos Santana, not Axl Rose. The music is actually pretty cool for what it is, but come on, I'm supposed to believe this is a GnR track?

6 - There Was a Time -This track started out pretty good, but the chorus kills it "It was the wrong time for you, it was the wrong time for me, it was the wrong time for everyone," who writes this garbage? (oh yeah, ego centric Axl Rose) The guitar is kind of cool though, although I'm really missing the interplay between Izzy's rhythm and Slash's lead... Where's my Velvet Revolver CD? Other than missing the rhythm guitar (which has been replaced by violins) I do think the lead guitar is interesting, and pretty cool, particularly the solo, so props to which ever of the 7 guitarists featured on the album that this is...

7 - Catcher in the Rye - So far this is my favorite track, the piano is good, the guitar is good and sounds like GnR, and the vocals fit really well. This is the kind of stuff I expect to hear from GnR. So here goes my first true props to Axl. As much as I really don't want to like anything about this album, I do think this track is pretty cool... It may even go into my GnR mix.

8 - Scraped - I'm getting tired of going on on every song... so no, just no, that's all you get for this one.

9 - Riad n' the Bedouins

10 - Sorry - I kind of like the music, it has an almost Pink Floydesq feel. I hate Axl's voice on this song, but musically its good.

11 - I.R.S.

12 - Madagascar

13 - This I Love

14 - Prostitute


So there you have it, its not a GnR album, it's an Axl solo album, and if he had the least bit of common sense he would have labeled it as so. I know that many of us would have had much more respect for the album if it would have been presented as such. One major issue I ran into is the fact the majority of the tracks are over 4 minutes and just drag, some of them probably would have been better if they would have been shorted. I give it a D+, it's not horrible, but in comparison to what GnR is, this is a joke... I'm sure you'll see hundreds of copies in the used CD stores within a matter of a few months. If you're looking for GnR, this isn't where you should be looking, go pick up the Velvet Revolver albums, you have more of GnR in that band than Axl's GnR will ever have, and additionally you don't have the ego factor behind it.

If Axel gets his act together and the second stamping of this album (if there is one) comes out for what this is, Axel's solo album... I'll considering moving my grade up to a C+...

The best part of this album is definitely the free Dr. Pepper, I'm getting because it came out. Thanks DP